A Real Wood Fireplace - Don’t Do It!
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The classic ideal of the romantic fireplace suggests that you just throw a log or two in the fireplace, strike a match, and sit back and enjoy the gentle, soothing warmth and the beauty of the dancing flames. Let me tell you, that isn’t the case.
In the first place, unless you’re buying firewood unsplit by the cord (128 cubic feet), you’re going to pay cut throat pricing. Split firewood runs about $400 per cord and higher. That’s partially dry wood, which means you have to buy it in the very early spring and then dry it yourself. Drying firewood means stacking it carefully to allow airflow through the stacks, but not just on the ground. You’ll need to place runners or long boards underneath to keep the wood elevated and off the moist ground. You’ll also need to cover it from above to keep the rain off it. Don’t just throw a tarp over it though or you’ll block the airflow and the tarp will prevent the moisture from escaping. Stacking it on your covered porch is pretty good, especially if you plan to use the wood during the winter or on rainy days. The alternative is trudging out through the rain or snow to lug back wood for the fireplace. At least the lifting and carrying will help you lose weight.
Once you got dry wood to burn, the real fun starts. By the way, if the wood isn’t sufficiently dry, it’ll burn cooler and create excessive creosote. Creosote is that fun black stuff that you see covering Chimney Sweeps in those great classic movies like Mary Poppins. It is also the cause of chimney fires. You see it sticks to the inside of the chimney and builds up in thick layers. Unfortunately, the stuff is flammable and can be ignited by sparks rising up from the fire, or just by very high temperatures if you let the fireplace get out of control. (I remember waiting outside in the snow on one fine Christmas morning as the firemen extinguished a chimney fire caused by disposing of the wrapping paper in the fireplace.)
Starting a fire takes more than striking a match. You have to start with kindling, smaller pieces of wood that burn more easily and quickly. You make a pile of kindling and then arrange the larger wood over it just so. The goal is to burn enough kindling so that by the time it burns out, the bigger pieces of wood have caught fire and there is enough of a base of ash to maintain the heat which supports the fire. By the end of the second or third year, you’ll either have learned to start a fire within 20 minutes or you’ll have given up the idea altogether.
Once the fire is started there’s the heat, lots and lots of heat. Expect the room with the fireplace to approach 80 or 90 degrees if it’s open to other rooms in the house. If it’s relatively closed then 100 degree temperatures should not be altogether unexpected. The good thing about the heat is that when the fire is really going well and throwing off lots of heat, the smoke is considerably lessened. Make no mistake though, the room and most of the house will smell of wood smoke, as will your clothes, your food, and quite possibly even your family pets. While in the latter case, this may be an improvement, it does take some getting used to. With practice, you’ll learn to adjust the damper properly to thoroughly fumigate the entire house.
Then if you can stand the blazing heat, you can finally sit back and enjoy the gentle beauty of the flames as they rapidly consume the properly dried wood that you paid $400 per cord or more for back in the spring. Of course, by this time, you may need to go back outside and get some more wood to throw on the fire to keep it going at a level that won’t make too much creosote and risk burning down the whole house.
So if you’re thinking of adding a fireplace, or firing up the one that came with the new house, think again. Wouldn’t it be so much easier to buy an electric fireplace, with a remote control that lets you turn the dancing flames on and off independently of the built-in heater? Take it from someone who’s been there, electric fireplaces and stoves are the way to go. And don’t even think about old-fashioned fireplace cooking, save yourself the aggravation and go with the electric grills.
Anyone searching for an electrician should take into consideration a few things, such as do the company offer free estimates, do they charge call-out fees, are there any hidden charges and what type of skills does the